Love Birds
by SweetLiars
Summary: ((#67 Retreat)) Kyo and Yuki have damaged his house for the last time! Shigure may have a solution. One week at a couples retreat might do the trick! X Rated T for language. (Made for my own personal writing challenge)
1. Plan for Payback

**Wow, it feels really good to be back! Okay. This story might have a lot of mistakes and if it does it will be edited accordingly. I just wanted to get this out, cause the muse had hit rather suddenly for it and it just flowed out of me! Hope all who read this enjoys it!**

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 **Chapter One**

 **Plan for Pay Back**

* * *

The room was an absolute mess; Shigure about fainted at the sight of it. The kotatsu was halved, splintery wood chippings scattered about the floorboards along with shards of glass from the busted window. A whole wall was ripped through, the paper carried through the house by the wind the hole let enter. Stacks of books brought out of Shigure's study for the annual spring cleaning were flung about the area, ripped out pages riding the same wind as the pieces of the wall. If someone had come to him ranting and raving about a tornado letting loose on his home he'd have surely known it to be in the form of two teenage boys. Even more so since they were still amongst the wreckage.

Rageful garnet eyes locked on to annoyed amethyst, both seeming to now be engaged in some sort of staring contest. They both breathed heavily, Kyo leaning against the wobbling TV stand and Yuki with his back against one of the few walls still intact, just… watching one another. Shigure gaped at all the damage caused by the two seventeen year old boys, angerwelling up within him. He'd forgiven them many times before but enough was simply enough! It was time for them to be punished accordingly, and since they're parents wouldn't be around for it themselves, he'd have to be the one to discipline them.

"That DOES it!"

Both of them lurched forward, heads swiveling towards the door. They both were surprised at Shigure's unannounced arrival, but Kyo just scoffed at the sight of him, crossing his arms and rolling his eyes. Yuki pushed off the wall, seeming to snap out of whatever had made him angry enough to cause this much devastation within the half hour he'd actually been home. A quick glance around the room was all that was needed for him to feel slightly bad about what they'd done, but he held an expression of cool indifference.

"You boys are out of control," Shigure continued, trying to put a little bass in his voice as he marched toward them. Still he sounded like he was shrieking more than yelling, which caused the two boys to care even less about his anger towards their actions. "What if poor Tohru had seen you acting like such rabid beasts?! Tearing through the house like you're the ones who pay for the damages!"

"She's not here," Kyo defended, moving one hand to rest on his hip and another to run at the raw bruise on his cheek.

Shigure started, "But if she was-"

"She isn't," Yuki interrupted, eyes cutting up to Shigure's from originally being cast down to the floor. Shigure huffed at the two defiant teens, frowning as he said, "Well that may be true, but she'll still have to come home to this mess. She's not foolish, she'll know good and we'll what caused this!"

This silenced both boys for a second. In the middle of an argument they sometimes forget about the sweet girl always watching from the sidelines, wishing they'd put aside their differences and be more like a family.

"Quit whining, mutt. We'll clean it up before she gets here," Kyo grumbled, only now starting to feel guilty about what they'd done. Knowing Tohru, she'd have come back, treated his wounds with that sad look on her face and cleaned up _their_ mess for them.

"You're absolutely right about that," Shigure tried to sound more authoritative, "But that's not all you'll be doing! As both of your legal guardians I have every right to punish you as I see fit."

"Excuse me?" Yuki questioned, half stunned and half amused by his statement. 'Punish' had never seemed to be a word in his already small vocabulary. In his years of living in this house he'd never been punished over anything.

Kyo glared at the man, saying incredulously, "What are you gonna do? Spank us?" Yuki brought his fingers to his lips, smiling against them and looking at the ground. Shigure gasped at his cousins. How could children manage to be so rude?

"Well… I'm not quite sure yet..." Shigure pondered this question as if the insult hadn't occurred. "But… When I figure something out you're gonna regret constantly breaking what I pay for!" What would he do to punish them? What COULD he do? It's not like he could force them to do anything; they didn't respect him enough to do as he says.

As if to further cement this thought, Yuki sighed and simply walked away, Kyo making a small 'tch' sound and following suit by hopping out the gaping hole in the wall. "Yeah, Yeah, whatever yah old dog."

"Wha-Hey, I'm not finished with you yet!" Shigure glanced between the two different directions, opting to go for the less hostile and most likely to listen of the two. Standing at the bottom of the steps, he shouted to Yuki as he ascended towards the second floor, "Come back here right now, or you'll pay for this!"

"Didn't you already say that?" Yuki asked without even sparing a glance backwards. "Making the same useless threat twice is going to make me listen anymore than I did the first time."

In the end Shigure did nothing but watch as the Ice Prince quietly entered his room.

* * *

"Honestly, Ha'ri, those boys are too much!"

It was now late afternoon. Shigure vented to the family doctor, Hatori, who also happened to be one of his closest friends. They sat on the deck in the man's office, staring out at what they could see of the Sohma Estate. It had rained a small amount after he'd arrived, making everything glitter in the iridescent light of the sunset. If he hadn't been in such a bad mood Shigure would have probably been paying more attention to the wind weaving through the trees, sending droplets of water down on to budding flowers and playing children. Instead, he shook his head at the thought of the teens in his care.

"No one said taking care of kids was easy," Hatori said in that infamously monotonous tone he kept in almost every situation and conversation. This made most people feel as if he was some kind of heartless being, but Shigure had known this man for a very long time. The sullen man's true problem lies in the fact that he cared too much.

"Even worse since they're teenagers-almost adults!" Hatori took a long drag of his cigarette, giving Shigure a sidelong glance.

"What will you do?" he asked.

"That is the question," Shigure answered with a troubled smile, putting his own cigarette between his lips and breathing in. "I mean, you'd think they'd be grateful that I brought them in, especially Yuki. For a while at least he was, but now? They both are so unappreciative!"

"That's what happens when you allow children to run rampant."

"Yes, I suppose so… I just wish I knew what to do with them. They get along about as well as oil and water." Hatori gave a deep sigh through his nose, finishing off his cigarette before putting it out on the ashtray beside him.

"Those two could use some counseling," he agreed, making Shigure chuckle.

"What, from you?"

"I'm a doctor, not a therapist."

"Oh, speaking of which, whatever happened to that adorable little shadow of yours?" Shigure asked, tilting his head back to look up at the darkening parts of the sky.

"Karin?" Hatori asked, continuing once he received a nod in response, "Why?"

"Oh, you know, just curious is all," Shigure said, thinking about the young woman who had come to him and asked so sweetly for the doctor to be her sensei as he put out his cigarette. Apparently she'd just entered Medical School and needed a mentor for hands on learning. And who better to teach her than her own family doctor whom she admired so much?

Regardless of his skepticism, Hatori answered, "She should be back tomorrow." Upon the nosy dog badgering him for details he continued, "She went to some sort of couples retreat with her boyfriend two weeks ago. Said the two of them had been fighting a lot recently and had some patching up to do. The rest is not any of my concern."

"Oh, well good for them." Shigure said, rolling his eyes toward Hatori, "Such a shame she has a boyfriend though."

The doctor didn't even dignify him with a response.

Suddenly, the wheels in Shigure's mind began to turn. Slowly at first, then quicker as he latched on to his plan. A couples retreat… For two stubborn people who needed to start get along. The more he thought about it, the more it appealed to him. And why wouldn't it? Not only was this the perfect punishment, it was a permanent solution to a long running problem. If the two of them could somehow work out their differences while there, when they'd get back, he'd never have to pay out of pocket for broken furniture or busted windows or even torn walls ever again!

"What are you so happy about?" Hatori asked, commenting on the fact that the dog was now humming merrily to himself and swinging his legs like you would expect from a giddy child.

Instead of answering, Shigure asked, "Say, what was the name of that couples retreat Karin went to?" Hatori lit another cigarette, glancing only briefly at his old friend. "Why?"

"Because I have an idea," Shigure admitted, "But I am gonna need your help."

Hatori pondered this request, blowing out a puff of smoke. Whatever it was the dog was planning, he knew it was gonna be hell for Kyo and Yuki. But then again, if he helped him out, then maybe he'd stop coming over to his office late in the evening to bother him about a bunch of kids.

"What are you planning?"

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 **I hope you all like this as much as I liked writing it. Thanks for your time!**

* * *

 **Disclaimer:** _I do not own Fruits Basket or any of its characters._


	2. Opposites

**14fox : **_Thank you! I hope I don't disappoint you!_

 **Killer Disco Queen : **_Yeah, I wanted to show the lack of respect they have for him. Me too! I'm actually finding that I really like writing about Hatori, so you might see more of him in the future. Thank you for your constant support, I dunno what I'd do without yah!_

 **MoonlitAtMidnight : **_Wow, thank you so much! And it came from deeeep in my fangirl mind. Waaay down in there._

 **TMNTlovergirl300** **:** _Well yay that you read the chapter right before an update! Thanks for reading!_

* * *

 **Chapter 2**

 **Opposites**

* * *

This was exactly why he and Kyo would never get along.

Not only did that stupid cat volunteer them both to clean up before Tohru returned, the imbecile hadn't returned since his departure! Shigure himself had gone to the main house about an hour and a half ago, leaving him to his thoughts. The only noises to be heard was the rhythmic tapping of afternoon rain against his window as he hold himself up in his room, which was the last thing they needed now that there was a huge hole in the wall. If Yuki had been thinking of anything except the heaps of homework/student council work he needed to take care of, he'd have taken precautionary measures to ensure the wood floors weren't soaked.

Glancing at a rectangular clock perched atop a tower of messily stacked textbooks, blaring numbers the color of yellow highlighters read 6 PM. A small sigh puffed past Yuki's thin, almost feminine lips and his violet eyes slid closed for just a moment. That was all he ever allowed himself, just a few seconds of calm. During this calm he faintly remembered Shigure's quick warning before he left stating that Tohru would be back soon after the sun would set. After calculating he realized this meant there was only about an hour left to fix up the room. Not like it was only his mess to clean, but he barely had enough time for everything as it was. Waiting any longer than he had for Kyo to show up would be a waste of time, and that was one of the many things the ice Prince refused to waste.

Each individual stair gave a low moan under the weight of his slender body. It wasn't like he weighed a ton, but that was enough to make him wonder whether it'd be a good idea to start working out. He'd thought that stress alone had been stealing his body pound by pound, but obviously this wasn't entirely true. A light jog every now and then wouldn't hurt, if he were careful.

Yuki breathed heavily to himself, leaning against the opening arch to their front room and staring at the mess. Knowing he had a hand in this was especially shameful, but that was the last thing on his mind. A part of him had been hoping to see the cat mopping up the obvious puddle on the floor or mending the wall. He saw the TV faced down on the tatami mat below the now collapsed entertainment center, watched the wind lift the few scraps of paper still lingering in the room, smelled the wet earth mixing with the distinct scent of sandalwood incense in an almost pleasant way, but no Kyo.

"Typical," he said to himself, rolling up the sleeves to his off-white button down. He'd have to do it all himself them. It's not like he'd ever put any of his faith into the cat before, why start now?

He started his work by sweeping the splintery wood chippings

from the kotatsu away from the larger parts. Then wrapped both his hands around the smaller of the two pieces, lifting it as much as he could off the ground before carrying it outside, ignoring the soft sprinkling of water faintly darkening his lilac locks. However one thing he could just barely ignore was the water now coating the bottom and sides of his once clean, dry socks. Already he could just _see_ the green from the grass staining the fabric. Yet another problem for Tohru. Maybe he should throw them away and spare her the trouble of trying to restore them? He set the hunk of garbage behind a nearby bush, hoping Tohru wouldn't be near it anytime soon.

Deciding "why not?" and keeping the socks on, Yuki lugged out the final piece, tugging extra hard to get it through the grass after almost smashing his foot to get it to the ground. All this work was just not worth the trouble and he missed sitting in his desk and stressing over his finals. He wasn't lazy, but when heavy lifting was involved he'd rather stick to his academics. Even if he'd wanted to though, he was sure there would be no more holding a pencil for the night. Since his fingers were long it was easy enough to get a firm grip on the kotatsu, but thanks to how soft they were there was nothing protecting from the dull ache brought on from his finger tugging against such a hard surface. With yet another sigh, he pressed his hands together, attempting to rub the pain away. Hopefully it'd leave quickly and he could go back to cleaning up-

"Cold, rat?"

Normally a voice suddenly coming from a tree branch just above your head would give you quite a shock, and Yuki himself wasn't immune to this surprise. However, after living with a stalking cat for so long he'd grown accustomed to hiding his mouse-like startlement. At first he hadn't planned on even giving the boy the briefest of glances, but he betrayed himself by stealing a glimpse at the dripping ginger standing with his hand pushed flat against the base of the tree and a condescending look in his glaring eyes.

"Not in the slightest," he answered tersely, taking quick strides back to the house while trying to maintain his balance in the more slippery parts of their lawn. A small thud and the rustling of leaves indicated that Kyo had decided to follow Yuki inside. Good. Now he didn't have to do the rest of the work himself. Didn't make the cat any more reliable.

Yuki stepped easily onto the elevated floorboards, slipping off his soggy socks and pinching them between his thumb and index finger. It wasn't as if they smelled bad-just like wet grass clippings-but they _felt_ disgusting. He hurried to the kitchen to throw them out when Kyo hopped into the room, almost failing to catch himself when his bare feet slid in the puddle that had accumulated. After catching himself and making sure the rat hadn't seen, he looked over the state of the room with a frown. The only noticeable difference was that the kotatsu was completely out, minus the small chips scattered about the far left side of the room, almost as if they'd been scattered on purpose. "Great job cleaning up," he said sarcastically as Yuki reentered the roomplacing his fists on his hips and scrunching his nose at the smells he couldn't quite place. All he could tell was that they were terrible together.

Yuki didn't very much like his demeaning tone. "Maybe if you'd shown up hours ago this would have been done and over with," he said, passing the baton of blame. There was no way it was his fault anyhow. He hadn't been the one to start the fight, and he hadn't been the one to volunteer to clean before Miss Honda returned. The ice in his voice could freeze blood and it showed far better than his expression exactly how he currently felt.

Kyo made a 'tsk' sound with his teeth and tongue, moving his arms so that they crossed in front of him. "Like I was gonna come back while that dumb mutt was still here."

"He left almost two hours ago."

"Like I'd've known that!" Kyo shouted in his own defense, causing Yuki to roll his eyes as he grabbed the broom.

"You would have if you had bothered to come back."

Silence fell between the two for a short moment, Kyo watching the almost unnoticeable shake of the rat's head. This simple movement annoyed him, mostly because he knew he should have been back. But it wasn't like he should feel bad anyhow! "Well I'm here now," he said finally, eliciting a breathy, unamused laugh from the princely boy in front of him.

"You're right," he said with a fake sugary tone, "you **are** here. So hurry and fix the wall you smashed through."

"It's not my fault! You're the one who sent me into it!" argued Kyo. It seemed like a pretty solid statement until Yuki gave him a look like he'd just seen stupidity itself.

"And you're the one who warranted it by picking a fight in the first place."

After some hesitation, Kyo growled, stomping off to retrieve the supplies for a proper repair. "Fine! But I'm not doin' for you, I'm doin' it for Tohru..."

Yuki watched the cat's angry departure with a twitch of a smirk. It always was a pleasant surprise when he won without a physical altercation. Sort of made the victory a little sweeter. That's if he wasn't so upset that a fight was what he needed. "I wouldn't have it any other way," he retorted, keeping his voice as indifferent as possible.

The next thirty minutes were spent in silence. Not like there was much to say. Ever since they were young it was a widely known fact that the two of them could never hold a decent conversation. Partly because from birth their zodiacs forbid any friendly relationship and partly since they don't really have anything in common. Or at least they thought they didn't. Not like they knew much about the other in the first place. To Yuki, Kyo was just as foul-mouthed as he was hot-headed; emotions sporadic, words never thought through, and actions almost always violent. He was feline in every sense of the word: lazy, feral, and finicky. To Kyo, Yuki was, put simply, an asshole. He was studious and proper and annoyingly smart. The goody-goody of the family who was always doing as he was told. As far as hobbies and such, Yuki knew that Kyo practiced martial arts, and Kyo knew even less than that about the rat.

A sneeze sounded throughout the room, louder than it would have been in the room's empty state. Yuki turned his head toward Kyo, whose hair was still dripping. Easy enough to ignore, not like it was him getting sick. All he had to do was finish up and he could go back upstairs-

"Achoo!"

"Go take a warm shower and dry off," Yuki said, his voice softer than he'd expected it to be. That wouldn't do, if he showed the cat any sort of kindness than he'd be leaving himself open to be taunted by his self-proclaimed enemy. "If you get sick Tohru will worry."

Kyo sat still for a moment, back to the rat. Maybe he was confused and thought Yuki actually cared, maybe he just didn't wanna take orders from him. Both seemed likely, but neither were proven as the boy rose to his feet. "Yeah, I'm goin'." He said, making it to the arch before stopping and standing there. "... Shigure seemed pissed off," Kyo muttered, almost to himself. If not for his turning around, Yuki would have assumed he was talking to himself. "Think he'll do what he said?"

Yuki shook his head slowly, focusing mostly on sweeping up the chipped out glass from the TV that refused to get into the dustpan. "No," he said, "Of course not. He lacks the backbone and authority." In all his years of living with the cheery man he'd never been punished for a thing. And that definitely wasn't gonna start now.

"Yeah, I guess you got a point," Kyo said, scoffing at the thought of Shigure attempting to "parent" them. "Besides, what can he really do?"

What _could_ he really do?

Now THAT was the question.

* * *

 **I'm trying to update much quicker with this story than the rest of mine, which isn't too hard since this story is kind of flowing out of me right now. I hope all who have read this enjoyed it even a little and come back for the next chapter.**

 _ **Thanks to those who Followed:**_

HELLOMello

Killer Disco Queen

MoonlitAtMidnight

TMNTlovergirl300

 _ **Thanks to those who chose this story as a Favorite:**_

Killer Disco Queen

MoonlitAtMidnight

TMNTlovergirl300


	3. A Cruel Fate

**Killer Disco Queen:** _Always showing your crazy, one review at a time... but I love it xD thank you, thank you! I've always done best with portraying Yuki, I'll admit, but this chapter is... well, I'm very sorry about the major fail that this chapter is. I did my best *cries in a corner* Aw, you don't wanna comment on my man? Tough for you, he's a main. You WILL give him a proper review! And thank you so much, the same goes for you too woman!_

 **James Birdsong:** _Thank you! This one isn't the best, but I hope you'll overlook it!_

 **MoonlitAtMidnight:** _I forgot too until i started writing it out. And really? Interesting... I mean, it makes sense, but I never actually thought about it. Well, you'll find that out next chapter... which will hopefully be a lot better. Thank you!_

* * *

 **Chapter 3**

 **A Cruel Fate**

* * *

Tensions were high and patience was wearing thin in the back seat of Hatori's expensive black car. A deep, bitter silence enveloped the two teens, who sat as close to their side's door as physically possible. They even went so far as to hardly even look glance toward the other's general direction, opting to stare down the foliage moving rapidly in and out of view from either side. The city had melted away a half hour ago, revealing a large open field before-you guessed it-a seemingly never-ending forest of large evergreen trees.

Kyo's leg bounced aggressively into the back of the passenger seat, aggravating Yuki to no end since the movement was constant in his peripheral vision. However, since he was ignoring him (or at the very least trying to), he chose to keep his mouth shut, allowing the finicky cat to jiggle the seat in front of him, especially since that was where their mutual enemy sat. Things were looking pretty bad for them right now. At first they hadn't even batted an eyelash at that stupid dog's declaration of vengeance, but now? Now things were a tad concerning.

In the passenger seat the mutt sat, humming to a sunny American pop song that Yuki just barely understood. The smile on his face was enough to worsen the rat's already foul mood. Shigure getting what he wanted, thanks to the ever-serious dragon behind the wheel, sickened him. The man sat straight up, eyes unwavering from the road ahead. If only Hatori didn't had the power to make him pack his bags. There was so much he had to take care of just today, let alone the next few days. Quite frankly he didn't have time for this, and he was positive Hatori didn't either.

Yuki glanced over just as Kyo crossed his arms and glared in front of him, staring down the dog's profile as he twisted to chat up the family doctor that probably wasn't listening. This wasn't fair. His leg had finally ceased its obsessive movement, but he didn't care about that. Maybe if he'd have just kept his face glued to the uneventful outside he'd have been able to keep calm. But not now. This was _his_ fault.

In a voice so light and hushed he was sure Kyo almost hadn't heard him, Yuki accused, "This is all your fault."

"How the hell is that?" Kyo asked a couple seconds later, as loudly as he dared. Wouldn't want Hatori to hear them arguing yet again during this forever-long car ride. Just to be sure, his amethyst orbs darkened to a deep plum with annoyance darted quickly in Hatori's direction, watching the doctor swiftly reach over and cut off the awful music the dog had been (somehow) enjoying the entire time the channel had been on. At first that would have made it harder for Yuki to respond, but the moment the music was off, Shigure kicked up a fuss, whining at the man to turn it back on.

After making sure the two of them weren't being paid any attention, he turned back to Kyo, who was now narrowing his eyes at him. "That fight started because of you," he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, "so that makes everything that's happening to us your fault."

Kyo scoffed, causing Yuki to attempt to shush him. "No, it's _your_ fault!" Yuki furrowed his brow, challenging the cat with a look that said "oh really?". The light tilting of his head toward the boy was a show of him listening to whatever idiocy he'd be subjected to next. "You're the one that kicked me into everything!" This was whispered so harshly that both of them faced the front to make sure the two were still bickering, then right back glare at one another.

"You're being too loud, you stupid cat." Yuki straightened himself in his seat, turning to place his elbow on the armrest attached to the door. Kyo grunted at him, giving himself a couple seconds of silence so that he didn't yell what he was about to say next.

"Don't call me stupid, you damned rat…"

"In order for that to happen you'd have to stop acting stupid, stupid."

That did it.

"It least I'm not a prissy little girly boy!" Kyo hollered, managing to get the two men to drop their conversation and pay closer attention to them. Yuki pressed his face into his palm, heaving a sigh with a shake of the head. The vindicated smile on Shigure's face spoke more than any words he could possibly think. At least that's what Kyo had thought, until the dog had asked, "Fighting again, are we? Luckily my belongings aren't around to take most of the damage." Hatori's gaze never faltered from the road, even as Shigure said to him with a decorative sigh, "This behavior just proves these boys are in need of this."

"Of _what?_ " Yuki asked coldly, hand falling from his face so he could better fix Shigure with an exasperated glare. "You have yet to even tell us where we're going."

Shigure pretended to ponder this statement for just a second, before a mischievous grin lit up his face. "It'll be a lot more fun if I don't." Kyo clenched his fists. The bastard was enjoying torturing them! Not like he hadn't known from the start, but the mutt could have at least attempted to hide it.

"Yeah, for you!" he said in a biting tone, causing Shigure to smile wider and turn back to sit in his seat. "Huh," he started, "I suppose it is."

The angry grunt that forced itself through Kyo's body was childish enough to make Yuki roll his eyes. The ginger shoved his knees into the back of the dog's seat again; A small bit of revenge, but his pleasure in it was short-lived when the dog snickered. The seat smoothly pulled forward and away from the cat's knees.

"Ugh!" Kyo sounded in frustration, "What the hell did I do to deserve this?!"

"Pick a fight," Yuki supplied, placing his elbow back on the armrest and his chin in the palm of his hand.

"Hey-" Kyo started, only to be promptly interrupted by a stern, monotonous warning: "I suggest you both stop fighting. Wouldn't want you to be gone any longer than you will be."

"How long will we be gone?" Yuki asked, worry shaping his features. Knowing the dog, he'd try to milk this for all it's worth. He just hoped it wouldn't be longer than one or two days. After all, he had responsibilities that just could not be put off.

Shigure looked over at Hatori, saying, "I think they should figure out about the program themselves."

" _Program?_ " asked Kyo. If they'd been signed up for something then chances were that they'd be away from home for an extended period of time. His and Yuki's eyes locked briefly, and in that moment they seemed to realize how bad things were going to be for them.

O

When thick green trees were replaced with vibrant pink prison walls, Kyo's eyes almost popped out of his head. 'There's no way,' he thought, mind racing to brace itself for what might be happening. While turning to look at Hatori to see if he would (hopefully) keep on driving he caught glimpse of Yuki looking at the bubblegum monstrosity with an equal level of terror.

When they pulled into the curved slate driveway the two teens sunk in their seats. Swirly hedges lined the stretch of road before them, fake green grass bright and out of place when lined with the rest of the forest. Silver street lamps with intricate and wavy designs amongst their metal all had two fairly large plastic birds dangling from them, swaying with the breeze. Kyo's eyebrows furrowed while Yuki sucked in a breath. What kind of hell was _this_?!

"We're finally here!" Shigure stared at the horrid place with loving eyes, while Hatori didn't really pay it too much attention. What HE was worried about was the medium-sized line they joined the end of. Cars of all kinds and colors waited their turns to park or let people out by the gate. Sadly for his younger cousins, they were going to be going it alone and finding out themselves what they'd gotten themselves into.

"Welcome to Love Birds Couples Retreat!" a chirpy young woman greeted at the opened gate to the place.

"Couples _what_?" Yuki practically bit at her, causing the girl's large smile to waver. "Um," she said, one of her tiny fingers beginning to twirl at her dyed blonde hair. Surprisingly she recovered quickly, clasping her hands together and fixing her friendly smile, regardless of the death glare she now received from Kyo. "Couples Retreat. This is a place where couples come seeking therapy for their…" she sucked in her bottom lip, searching for the right word to use, "... _problematic_ relationships. You are seeking therapy, right?" This skeptical question was met with hollerings of "NO!" from the two boys. Like hell they'd seek anything close to that! Like hell they'd _stay_ for anything like that!

Shigure quickly covered their mouths with his hands, laughing at the situation in its entirety. Oh, how he enjoyed basking in their sorrow, in their rage. They'd surely know not to cross him after this, that was for certain! Hatori would have to thoroughly be thanked later for his participation.

"Sweetheart," he addressed the girl, whom immediately perked up at the pet name. Both the both the boys struggled as hard as they could, but to their own surprise, the man barely budged. Even so, it'd have been easy enough to jab one of their elbows into his ribs had Hatori not been their to scold them if they happened to injure the annoying zodiac dog. "We are from the Sohma family."

The shift in her approach towards them was abrupt. Her brown eyes widened and she made an 'O' with her cherry red lips. "Right! We've been expecting you, Sohma-san," she said respectfully, beckoning them forward with a wave of her hand. Hatori wheeled in the suitcases, Shigure lugged in the boys. Kyo thrashed around wildly, roaring, "No way in _HELL_ am I going to a damn COUPLES RETREAT with _**him**_ _!"_ This gained quite a bit of attention, the other REAL couples giggling amongst themselves. This was literally the last thing that he'd have even thought to think of about what Shigure would do to them. This had to be the cruelest torture yet, Kagura herself couldn't top it. Well... that wasn't true. If he'd been sent with _her_ then it'd be a million times worse. Like he'd tell the dumb rat that.

"Like I wanna be here with _you_ either, you stupid cat," Yuki spat out, halting in his light twisting and turning. It was never fun to be the center of attention in a large crowd of those you don't know. Already the embarrassment of the situation was burning at his cheeks. Sfought and fussed the entire trip to the main office in the building, where the girl stopped and gestured to the door. "You can check them in here while I show them to their rooms. Should I… Call security?" she asked, glancing over at the still struggling boys.

"That won't be necessary," Hatori assured, casting his deathly serious gaze one the two boys in question. "Listen to me. If you two are good you'll only be here for a week." Yuki deflated with shock and Kyo's mouth fell open. "Keep this up and you'll be here for two. You decide."

The two were silent, weighing out their options, like they really had any. Yuki was numb. This whole thing was too crazy to be true, too bizarre to be believed. How was it possible for them to be at a "Couples" Retreat and they weren't a couple? Maybe if he brought this to the person in charge's attention they could fix this little mix up. But, with the way the woman had recognized their name, he was sure they'd already spoken to someone about this.

"A _week_?! This is screwed up," Kyo gritted out through clenched teeth, killing the two men a thousand and one ways in his mind. "You guys are sick!" Shigure shrugged his shoulders, shooing them away with the biggest smile they'd seen in a long time.

They may have been especially cruel for this… But, the way Yuki saw it… They didn't have a choice. So he followed the woman as she lead them away, listened as Kyo ranted and raved, ignored him when he tried to start a fight. Instead of engaging the cat, he glanced behind him, and his eyes narrowed as he saw Shigure and Hatori heading into the building. Before he entere, however, the dog turned his gaze upon the rat, his smirk unhindered and content.

* * *

 **Truly, I feel like I've failed everyone and myself with this chapter, but I PROMISE the next will be so much better, I will make sure of it! this was rushed (mostly because I didn't really wanna write it, I wanted to hurry to the fun part) so please don't hate me. Honestly, I wouldn't even be mad if you ignored this chapter and waited for the next, seriously. I'm so sorry T~T**

 _ **Thanks to those who Followed:**_

HELLOMello

Killer Disco Queen

MarieHer15

MoonlitAtMidnight

NaraKurai

TMNTlovergirl300

iloveanime1322

tiger56761

 _ **Thanks to those who chose this story as a Favorite:**_

Killer Disco Queen

MoonlitAtMidnight

TMNTlovergirl300

tiger56761


	4. Sleeping Princess

**Hello guys! This has taken me forever to update, I know, I'm sorry! I wasn't going to end the chapter right here, but there are SO MANY people that started following it recently and I just don't want to let everyone down.**

 **Killer Disco Queen:** _Daw, why are you always so sweet? Thank you! Yes, in your heart of hearts you know how Shigure captured Hatori for his twisted plans. And HA! Yeah, poor Yuki and f*ck Kyo, that's your reviews in a nutshell xDD but I hope you enjoyed this chapter._

 **MoonlitAtMidnight:** _Description is something I can struggle a bit with, so I've been trying harder recently to incorporate more. So thank you, that actually really makes me feel better. And unfortunately I didn't get to add what will be going on this chapter (though I guess in hindsight that would have made this waaaay longer than it is now) so you'll find out some in the next._

 **Blood tinted rain:** _Thank you so much, I'd love to show you, if you can bare with me! This ride is gonna be bumpy!_

* * *

 **Chapter 4**

 **Sleeping Princess**

* * *

The morning greeted Kyo with chirping birds. Such a simple, familiar sound; It was almost enough to make him forget about the hell he was being subjected to. He sat up from his position on the floor and slowly ran his fingers through his sleep-mussed hair, looking upward to the bed he was supposed to be in. However, thanks to last night's events, he hadn't even bothered to take back his side.

They'd gotten to the room only to find out that there was _one_ large bed, which was surprising since that wasn't very traditional in Japanese culture. And _of course_ Yuki decided to take the left side, like the control freak he was. Well… it's not really like Kyo ever really slept to the left, but that wasn't the point! Naturally they had begun to argue about sharing, which resulted in him getting literally kicked to the floor. And into the wall. Quite a few times.

"Dirty rat," he grumbled to himself. Thanks to the fact that he was used to sleeping on a futon it wasn't hard for him to raise to his feet from being so close to the ground. After successfully making it to his feet his garnet gaze scrutinized the room in its entirety. He couldn't shake the knowledge that this was all because of a stupid arguement. It wasn't _his_ fault that the rat got so sensitive over something so small, so that meant it also wasn't _his_ fault that they fought. Maybe he should have pointed that out before, when the great and almighty _Yuki_ had tried to pin everything on him in the car, but he was so mad that he hadn't even thought of a proper comeback. That's how it normally was-Kyo snapped at Yuki, Yuki said something clever, and Kyo threw a punch. Maybe a couple things added in here and there, but it always ended up with his face in the concrete, or the dirt, or the hardwood. Why couldn't he ever win? It wasn't like the rat even practiced martial arts, how was he so nimble?

The sun had just barely peeked over the horizon. Kyo placed his calloused hand flat against the glass and felt the warmth of the morning air work its way into his palm and spread through his fingers. Compared to the A/C controlled room he was currently residing in, it was Heaven outside. Perfect for a run. In seconds he was digging through his suitcase, keeping the clothes he didn't need neatly folded and placing them in a dresser at the foot of the bed. If he didn't hate Yuki's guts he might have unpacked for him as well. But he did, so he snatched up his navy running shorts and a grey undershirt, and headed to the bathroom without even glancing back at the untouched black suitcase by the door. As expected, when he emerged wearing the clothing he'd selected and a towel draped around his shoulders, the rat was still sleeping so deeply you could have mistaken him for that one Disney princess, that pricked her finger on the needle thing. He definitely looked girly enough for the part. This thought caused Kyo to smirk. After all, what was more fun than poking fun at Mr. Perfect? He checked the clock on the nightstand; 5:30 a.m. it read, indicating that once again Kyo had gotten up just in time to take a nice two-three hour run. Not like the time really mattered since they wouldn't be going to school anyhow.

Kyo headed out, weaving down semi-long corridors he'd memorized the other day and breaking free of the cold to embrace the gentle heat of the Spring morning.

XxXxX

The walls connecting their personal bathroom to the bedroom were surprisingly thin. Yuki awoke to running water, which evoked quite a bit of confusion. For starters his room wasn't right next to the bedroom-actually, they were the furthest rooms from the other upstairs. And another problem was the smell. The pillows supporting his head smelled pungent and strangely chemical, like fresh linen from a spray can. For a couple minutes he tried to understand exactly where he was without actually opening his eyes to figure it out. Sleep could possibly pull him back under if he kept still enough, but his side was starting to hurt from lack of movement and he was far too curious to just ignore the unfamiliar sounds and smells of his environment. He sat up and sluggishly scanned the room with bleary violet eyes. He brought the back of his hand to his eye, rubbing at it with a yawn, then went back to putting together the pieces of a very bemusing puzzle. Nothing seemed to click in his tired mind, and it was frustrating him to the point that his mouth settled itself into a small frown. He saw light pink wallpaper with small red and white hearts lining its borders, a dark mahogany desk shoved to the far corner of the wall to his left, just out of the way of the window, with a matching dresser pressed firmly against the end of the bed he was lying in. The fluffy comforter that he was tucked under was snow white with blue and purple birds sweeping from the far right to the upper left. There was something about the almost cartoon-y style used for the birds that seemed familiar, but his attention was soon averted to the bathroom door opening, revealing the scantily-clad cat of the zodiac. His tangerine locks were laid flat and dripping wet against his head.

"Looks like the princess is awake," Kyo mocked him, giving a hard shiver as he bent down in front of the dresser. This made the entire situation much more difficult to process.

"... What?" Yuki asked, clearing his throat to get rid of that croaky sound that had accompanied his words. Lucky him Kyo didn't comment on it, possibly cause he didn't care.

"You looked like that sleeping princess from that one fairy tale."

Thanks to the fog of sleep disappearing from his mind, Yuki was able to register what exactly he was talking about, and he wasn't amused. "You mean Aurora?"

Kyo's face scrunched up, "Who?"

"Princess Aurora? _Sleeping Beauty?_ " Yuki clarified, now unsure of whether or not that was whom the other was speaking of. It wasn't like there were any other famous princess that slept for extended periods of time… right?

"Oh," Kyo sounded, pausing to sneeze and rise to his feet, "yeah, her."

This upset Yuki. He had many variants of nicknames, and princess was one he refused to allow to spread. Kakeru, the vice president of the student council, already teased him enough with that as it was. "Well…" he watched that ginger hair sprinkle water droplets across the floor. "You look like Ariel."

Kyo paused in his movements, hand grasping at the nob to the bathroom door. " _Who_?" he asked skeptically, causing Yuki to lean back against the headboard with a sigh. Leave it to Kyo to joke about something he knew virtually nothing about in the first place. Why did he even bother with such an imbecile?

"No one. Get dressed before you catch a cold." The untrusting look on Kyo's face spoke of his feelings on the Ice Prince not answering his question, but he just hurried into the bathroom, back to the smoky heat he'd missed when he originally left said room.

In the ten minutes that Kyo was dressing and doing god-knows-what, Yuki had managed to sloppily remove his clothes from his suitcase. They covered the floor beside him and the doorway, but he paid it no special attention and kept looking for something to change into after he himself took a nice, warm shower. Finally he had settled on a white button up and a pair of black slacks. As long as he could remember his clothing was always semi-formal, but comfortable. That was precisely why he stuck to the particular style. Besides, it suited him.

Kyo exited the bathroom while Yuki scooped up a couple articles of clothing and shoveled it back into it's container. The ginger wore his signature ab-hugging black shirt. Although it was Spring, he wore long pants, probably having forgotten to bring back out his cargo shorts that he loved so much.

"Is it impossible for you to be, I dunno... Neat?" Kyo asked with a raised eyebrow, staring down at the rat from his position on his knees. They hadn't been here a full 24 hours and already the place was getting Yuki-fied! Just the thought of what the guy's room must look like was enough to make him shudder.

"As impossible as it is for you to speak to me without giving me a migraine," Yuki bit back, not in the mood to be scolded over his messy tendencies. Kyo hollered "hey!" as he pushed past him and into the bathroom, bringing his clothes with him. The warmth enveloped him as quickly as he'd entered, and he wasted no time in preparing the perfect shower temperature before slipping out of his clothes and gingerly stepping inside the bathtub. From then on it took approximately 7 minutes of shampooing and conditioning his hair and 10 minutes of washing up. Normally it never took him so long, but without the thought of homework or student council or even actually going to school looming over him he could finally unwind a tad bit. Maybe a little more if he wasn't stuck with Kyo. But he was, so he made do with what little he'd been given.

Twenty minutes later he opened the door and breathed in a large amount of cold air that stung his lungs. This was too much-his body already managed to stay cool as it was without the extra chill helping to practically freeze his blood. Shouldn't there be a thermostat somewhere? The thought was enough to bring him fully out of the bathroom. Although his mission was clear, he was soon distracted by Kyo-well, more so what he had in his hand.

"Is that… An itinerary?" he guessed, having recognized the professional display of papers laminated and covered by a thin see-through sheet of plastic. Kyo scoffed. Whether it was at him or the item in his possession Yuki was unsure, but he decided to ignore it for now in exchange for keeping things as friendly as they could possibly be when the rat and cat are forced to share a room with one bed and bathroom.

"See for yourself." Kyo tossed it onto the bed right in front of Yuki, who immediately picked it up and began to read.

"Breakfast at eight-thirty, counseling at nine-thirty," he mumbled to himself, glancing towards Kyo who had flung himself across the bed. The thought of seeing some sort of couples therapist when he and Kyo didn't date, didn't even _like_ each other, was completely off putting. The thought of telling them about this little detail crossed his mind again, but once again he brushed it off. "What time is it?" he asked, setting the itinerary down on the dresser. Kyo sighed as if this was the most inconveniencing question that could have been asked. "I dunno… maybe nine? Why?" This question went unanswered for a moment while Yuki processed what he'd been told. It definitely wasn't the latest time he's woken up, but it wasn't the earliest either. If he left now he could make it just in time to get something in his stomach. If he couldn't have Tohru's cooking for a week then all he'd force down was a muffin or two, that's if they had any. " _Why?_ " Kyo asked again, sitting up and glaring over at him. Normally the cat would have probably just rolled his eyes and stopped speaking to him, but Yuki had the distinct feeling that the ginger was looking for a reason to argue.

"I'm leaving for breakfast," he explained, "though I don't see why that's your business."

Kyo scoffed, rolling to face away from him on the bed. "Whatever." This behaviour coming from him was as common as it was childish, and Yuki was getting sick of it. Why couldn't all the teens in the world be as intelligent and sophisticated as him?

"You better be at counselling," he warned. There was _no way_ he was gonna stay longer just because the idiot before him wanted to be difficult and defiant. Hatori gave that warning and he trusted those words. However, no matter how much HE cared about the warning, the only thing he got in response was a grunt. Really it was lucky he even got that. So he left, breathing in fresh air that he didn't have to share, and navigating his body through the long corridors in hopes of finding the cafeteria in their housing building. It took quite a bit of walking before he saw a couple step out of their room, smiles plastered on their faces like they were required to be happy.

"Excuse me," he called, hurrying towards them. Both the man and woman looked to be in their late twenties-early thirties, but that didn't stop the woman from having to do a sort of double take as soon as she'd caught sight of him.

"Oh my," she said under her breath, biting her cherry red lip and allowing those mint green eyes to roam his slender physique. Her boyfriend-no, fiancé, there was an engagement ring-just stared down at her, smile waning the more she appraised him like a priceless artifact. But Yuki was used to this hungry stare thanks to the girls in his high school, so even though it was uncomfortable he was able to keep his composure. "What can I help you with, cutie?" she asked, all sweet and girly, tossing a lock of auburn hair behind her back with her free hand. Her arm was tightened in her fiancé's grip, but that didn't stop her from shamelessly flirting. "Anything you need from me?"

"Just directions," he said as friendly as he dared. "This is my first day here and I can't seem to locate the cafeteria."

"That's where we're going. You can follow us, if you'd like," the guy piped up, turning on his heels with the girl in tow and pulling her along. The rough treatment of the small woman definitely wasn't appropriate, but Yuki could only imagine what the man must be going through with such a flirtatious lover. So he kept his thoughts to himself and followed close behind them, giving a sort of unsure smile towards the woman's constant looking over her shoulder.

The cafeteria was colorful and rich with very prominent, sugary scent that reminded him of a bakery. It wasn't too bad, since he sort of already expected it, but he was never really big on junk food for breakfast. However, as he allowed the couple to guide him through the many selections they were presented with, he realized how balanced it was. Sure, there was a lot of donuts and french toast and stacks after stacks of pancakes filled variants of chocolate, but there was a ton of fruits and vegetables, whole wheat toast, and even a varying selection of prices and fish, which felt sort of strange to Yuki-with the whole American feel the place had, he hadn't expected it or anything associated with Asian culture to be served.

"C'mon, sweetie," the woman called to him, loading her plate with blueberry muffins and belgian waffles, "It's all free!"

Not like that really mattered for Yuki, but he did as the woman suggested, deciding it was best to stick with the healthier side of his options. As he'd somewhat suspected, he was invited to sit with the couple, though the man seemed more than a little reluctant. To ease his worries he sat on the opposite side of the woman. He picked at his food and smiled politely as they spoke. There wasn't much room for him to speak and he was grateful for it since he didn't have much to say. All he could think about was the ticking clock counting down to the inevitable horror show that would ensue when he and Kyo would be forced to talk about their feelings. He didn't have much to say about that either. Of course he hadn't meant wreck the front the room (not like he particularly cared about how the dog felt about it), but Kyo shouldn't have said what he said. It was his fault, all of this.

"-un? Hun, are you alright?"

Yuki flinched away from the shoe that tapped his leg. His vibrant amethyst eyes met the concerned looks of the couple in front of him. "I'm sorry?" he asked. The two of them shared worried glances, but said nothing. A couple minutes passed in silence, then their chatter picked back up and Yuki relaxed a bit now that they weren't staring at him. This was short lived, however, when he felt a body slide next to him, just close enough for their body heat to send goosebumps up his arm.

"It's five minutes till," Yuki quipped at the orangette finally managing to make it outside their room. "Couldn't you have left ten minutes ago?"

Kyo rolled his eyes, turning his head to face the opposite direction of the Ice Prince. "Who cares? I'm here, aren't I?" _Fair enough_ , Yuki thought, continuing to poke at the fresh cut strawberries on his plate.

The couple stared at the two polar opposites with funny expressions, before the woman timidly asked, "Um… So you two are… Here together?"

"Yeah, so?" Kyo asked, causing Yuki to hold his head in his hands with a deep sigh. Of course the idiot cat had no idea what he just implied. The woman's reaction alone showed his thoughts to be true and she awkwardly coughed into her hand, immediately starting a conversation with her fiance about any random topic she could think of.

Those few minutes passed slowly, but when they did both sets of "couples" rose to their feet.

"Which room were you assigned to?" the man asked, glancing between Yuki and Kyo like he expected the two of them the start making out at any moment. Just from memory alone Yuki told him and was promptly told that as date would have it that was their room as well.

"You could follow us if you'd like," the woman insisted, though she seemed significantly less flirty than before. Yuki couldn't wrap his head around why that would be. They obviously believed he and Kyo were an item (ugh), so what was so different about him being here with a guy that made the woman stop flirting? Whatever the reason, he was thankful for it.

"That'd be great, thank you," said Yuki, using them as his guide with Kyo stomping along right behind him.

* * *

 **That part that was the most fun to write was the beginning, though you can probably guess that. As requested of one of my dearest friends, she will be the top, for she is the High Queen herself. Thank you to anyone and everything that gave this a read, whether you liked or hated it, reviewed or gave it a good "meh" in response!**

 _ **Thanks to those who Followed:**_

Killer Disco Queen

Blood tinted rain

BookWarrior23

HELLOMello

HardCoreYaoiLove

MarieHer15

MoonlitAtMidnight

NaraKurai

TaraLovesAnime

iloveanime1322

tiger56761

 _ **Thanks to those who chose this story as a Favorite:**_

Killer Disco Queen

MoonlitAtMidnight

TaraLovesAnime

ferisca

tiger56761


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